Kathryn or The Captain
by Saffie-lew
Summary: Kathryn and Chakotays relationship changed after an innocent birthday gift and now it has very little to do with that. Please read and review. The end is finally upon us. I have posted an epilogue because nobody seemed to like the ending. COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

This is my second Voyager story, I haven't finished my first yet but I had to start writing this one now.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Star-trek Voyager or any of these characters except for ensign Davis. (If I'm wrong sorry but I'm pretty sure I thought of her).  
  
Spoilers: none.  
  
Kathryn or The Captain  
  
  
  
Captain Kathryn Janeway walked into the mess hall on her ship, the U.S.S. Voyager and glanced across the room, to the far corner. She saw her First Officer, sitting with Ensign Davis, looking very comfortable. He turned, sensing he was being watched and saw her by the doorway. Their eyes locked for just a moment before she looked away, cursing herself. She sat at the nearest table and stared at the PADD in her hand, not really seeing the data, lost in her memory.  
  
Five days ago, her birthday. Chakotay had entered her ready room with a small leather pouch in his hand.  
  
"Can I help you Commander?" She'd asked him, she had been sitting on the couch by the view ports.  
  
"Happy Birthday Kathryn," he'd said holding out the pouch for her to take.  
  
She'd stood up and stepped forward, smiling and taking it from him. She'd looked up at his face, he was smiling at her, with those dimples, and he had to know what they did to her. She'd had to look back down at the pouch to stop her train of thought and had opened it taking out the gift. A silver heart with sections containing tiny, beautiful pieces of coloured glass. Like a miniature stained glass window hanging from a delicate silver chain. So small and innocent, just a birthday gift from a friend, but the symbolism was obvious; he was giving her a heart, his heart. It must have taken him a long time to design something so intricate, it was perfect. She loved it, but she didn't tell him that.  
  
"Thank you, it's nice," that's what she had said.  
  
She remembered the hurt that flashed across his face. He'd recovered quickly, clearly used to it by now.  
  
He deserved it, she'd though at the time, he'd crossed the line, the invisible line that existed between them. What was he expecting anyway? That she'd suddenly forget duty, protocol, just because of one birthday gift.  
  
Since that time she'd barely spoken to him unless it was about work, she'd stopped inviting him to dinner. He'd crossed the line and she'd done her best to push him right back over it again so she'd be safe. She'd apparently pushed him too far this time, according to the rumours on the ship; he'd been getting very close to Ensign Davis.  
  
She couldn't blame him; he didn't know that she wore the necklace under her uniform every day even though it was against regulation, not to mention her own rules, the parameters she'd defined for herself regarding Chakotay. She touched her shirt; the necklace lay beneath her fingers. She looked over at Chakotay and the Ensign again, they were holding hands.  
  
New Earth, she thought, remembering the time he'd held her hand like that. She immediately wished she hadn't, everything was different then, there was no ship; no crew just the two of them. She remembered how they'd talked, how he'd held her, just held her because they hadn't wanted to rush things, they'd had plenty of time. She looked back down at the PADD and tried to concentrate on the words.  
  
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I know it's short but the second part is coming soon.  
  
Please review it, I'd appreciate any response, ideas are also always welcome. 


	2. Chapter 2

Second part, I put it up right away because I'm off ill and have nothing better to do with my time.  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager and her characters aren't mine (except for Ensign Cassie Davis)  
  
Spoilers: Only Resolutions a bit, but that's really early.  
  
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He'd seen her come in. He was sitting in the corner talking to Cassie, but he was staring at his Captain. He saw her break her gaze and sit down to read a PADD. She looked so beautiful, so distant. He knew that she wasn't reading, he'd watched her for long enough over the years to know that. He'd analysed her moods, her movements, her expressions.  
  
They hadn't been speaking much in the last few days, since her birthday when he'd given her the necklace he'd designed, a heart. Before that they'd seemed to be getting on better than they had for a while, they'd more relaxed, talking more often and getting closer. After the present she'd started to avoid him again, not speaking to him unless it was about work and even then she'd sounded so professional. He knew that he'd compromised their delicate relationship.  
  
He turned back to Cassie, she was pretty, smart, kind, and she had been flirting with him for weeks, but she wasn't Kathryn. He liked her though, maybe that was enough, it was time he forgot about Kathryn, she was the Captain, nothing could happen between them, not like on New Earth.  
  
He tried to concentrate on what Cassie was saying, something about B'Elanna, she asked his opinion. He took her hand and stroked it gently with his thumb to cover up the fact he hadn't been listening.  
  
She had such small hands, with soft white skin, like Kathryn's. He forced himself to suppress that thought and looked up at Cassie.  
  
This wasn't going to work.  
  
************************************************************************ 3rd part will be up very soon, I've practically written it already, just need to type it up.  
  
Remember to review this chapter please. 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3, all I can say is pretty much the same as the other ones, its really short and I tried to make it easy to read for you. Please read me and feed me (remember to review).  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager isn't mine, the characters aren't mine (except for Cassie Davis I think).  
  
************************************************************************ She was standing outside his door; her outward calm was being disrupted by her inward panic as she tried to control her breathing without much success. It wasn't like her to panic at anything, she'd faced the Borg, the Hirogen, Species 8472, but here she was outside her First Officer's quarters, panicking because she was about to apologise.  
  
"Come on Kathryn," she muttered under her breath, "you can do this."  
  
She pressed the button beside the door.  
  
"Come in," the voice called from inside, Kathryn felt her pulse quicken, she took another deep breath and entered.  
  
He was sitting on the couch with a PADD in one hand and a glass of some dark red liquid that looked like wine in the other.  
  
"Captain," he said standing up, she held out a hand to stop him. He was following their latest rhythm, being totally professional.  
  
"Chakotay," she said, she saw him relax when she used his name to address him instead of his rank. "Can I sit down?"  
  
"Of course," he said, his tone was promising, but she was the Captain he couldn't exactly chuck her out.  
  
"I want to apologise for the way I've been behaving the past few days," she said, looking up at him, "it's just birthday's they get to me a little bit."  
  
She was lying to him but she couldn't exactly tell him the truth, well she could but it would complicate things even further, and she could do without that.  
  
"It's o.k., forgotten," he said walking over to the kitchen area of his quarters.  
  
"So, she said her tone of voice showed that she was fishing and had a nervous edge to it but she couldn't help it, "what's this I hear about you and Ensign Davis?"  
  
He smiled, and looked down, but she caught a glimpse of those dimples.  
  
"There's nothing going on," he said honestly, blushing slightly, "she's not my type." He looked at her as he said that.  
  
He knew what she was doing; she stood up and turned to the door.  
  
"Well if there's no gossip, then I'd better be going," she said, wanting to leave as quickly as possible "as usual I have a lot of work to do."  
  
"There's always gossip on a ship this size," he said, he was standing in front of her now with another glass in his hand. So close, inches away, and moving closer, or was it her moving, their lips brushed and locked. Her arms went around his neck and his around her waist, it started to get more frantic and they fell to the couch.  
  
No, no, no.  
  
She screamed at herself remembering who she was and pulling away and quickly shuffling to the other side of the sofa.  
  
"That shouldn't have happened," she stated, her voice surprisingly shaky for somebody who had stared down the Borg queen.  
  
He just nodded, slowly. She wasn't sure whether he agreed with her or not, but he was accepting it so she stood up to leave.  
  
"Wait," he said from the couch, "have a drink, a belated birthday drink." He was holding out the spare glass that he had just gotten from the kitchen.  
  
"O.k.," she said before she could stop herself.  
  
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Thanks for reading.  
  
Please Review, Review Review.  
  
The next chapter will be up soon, I'm sorry if this chapter seems a little bit out of character but I had to write it like that, it was screaming at me. 


	4. Chapter 4

Okay, very short chapter here but that's the way I wrote it.  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager and its characters do not belong to me.  
  
Three hours and two large bottles of Talaxian wine later they at laughing in his quarters. He'd never seen the Captain drunk, it was quite amusing, but then, he wasn't exactly clear headed. They'd both stopped laughing, the room was silent, he was staring at her but that was o.k. because she was staring at him.  
  
She was sitting with her legs curled underneath her and her fingers were caressing the wine glass in her hands. The atmosphere in the room changed, became electric. He looked into her eyes, they looked hungry.  
  
Something inside him was screaming that this was wrong but he ignored it and put down his glass, she did the same. She leaned forward and put a hand on the side of his face, caressing it like she had the glass. He kissed her, running his fingers through her hair. They were lying down; she was on top of him.  
  
How had that happened?  
  
She was kissing his neck pulling at his top with her teeth. He was trying to think, to clear his head but it wasn't working so he kissed her instead. She looked right into his eyes and then closed her own, passing out on top of him.  
  
He laughed, and looked down at her head which was lying on his chest, part of him felt relieved, he knew he hadn't had the strength to stop it and he couldn't take advantage of her like that. He'd be happy to let her lie where she was all night, but then he wouldn't be much of a gentleman.  
  
Somehow he managed to pick her up and carry her to his bedroom; gently he placed her on his bed and watched her for a moment before returning to the couch to sleep. Like a perfect gentleman.  
  
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I know its short and possibly out of character but I had to write it that way because it told me to.  
  
Please remember to review. Thank you. 


	5. Chapter 5

Fifth chapter up already, as I said I'm off ill so I have nothing better to do, day time telly is so boring.  
  
Disclaimer: Again, Voyager is not mine; I just wanted to write a story about it.  
  
Oh god  
  
Her head was killing, she should have stopped by sickbay for a painkiller but she didn't feel up to a lecture from the doctor. Her only consolation was that Chakotay looked as ill as she did. He was standing on the other side of the turbo lift holding on to the wall, she threw him a look of sympathy.  
  
The doors opened loudly on the bridge and the Captain was forced to put a hand up to her head in a futile effort to stop it hurting. Chakotay gestured for her to walk out first and she did, ordering for a report in a quite and croaky voice.  
  
Tuvok began giving her the details and she held up a hand to stop him. Her eyes were half closed because the lights of the ship were hurting her head more. She watched Tuvok's eyebrow raise, a gesture that would normally amuse her but not today.  
  
"Today," she said in the same hoarse voice, "we're all going to talk quietly."  
  
Tuvok's eyebrow shot up even further.  
  
"Belated birthday drinks," Chakotay said in explanation from his seat, rubbing his temples.  
  
"Commander, you have the bridge," she said and walked into her ready room without waiting for a response, "computer, turn off the lights." They'd come on automatically when she had entered the room.  
  
She lay down on the sofa and tried to remember why she'd accepted that drink, and another, and another, and whether she'd done anything to embarrass herself.  
  
She shut her eyes and groaned, seeing images of the night before dancing on her eyelids, she couldn't remember much after her fourth glass which was probably for the best judging on what she could remember.  
  
She'd woken up that morning feeling terrible, it took her a moment to figure out where she was and when she did she sat up suddenly, which made her head throb more. She calmed down when she realised that she was fully clothed and alone and she had rested her head back on the pillow for a moment.  
  
Its short like the rest of the chapters, partly so its easy to read and partly because I wrote it in those sections.  
  
As usual comments are very welcome.  
  
Be kind, review. 


	6. Chapter 6

Next chapter, and all in the same day. I really am bored.  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager and it's characters are not mine, they belong to some really rich guy with much better things to do than write this. (Like shop)  
  
I don't think there are any spoilers at all in the story, if I'm wrong please tell me and REVIEW.  
  
  
  
He was sitting in his chair on the bridge feeling awful. He wished he could go and hide in the dark like he knew Kathryn had, better still with Kathryn, that wouldn't happen though, at least not when she was sober. He was suddenly aware that Lieutenant Paris was speaking to him.  
  
"What?" He said.  
  
"I said, rough night?" Tom asked again.  
  
"I can't remember," He said, Tom laughed, "I think I was fine until I woke up this morning on the sofa," he emphasised, "with a monster headache and a bad back."  
  
Tom laughed again and Chakotay smiled.  
  
"Mr Paris, you have the bridge." He said heading towards the Captains ready room.  
  
"Aye, sir," the reply.  
  
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"Come in," she shouted as loud as she could manage. She was still lying on the sofa with her eyes closed.  
  
"Captain," Chakotay said as he walked into the dark room.  
  
"Yes Commander, is there a problem?" She asked she wanted to be left alone.  
  
"Um, no Captain," he said, she could tell that there was something he wanted to say, she knew him, he was considering her mood. "I, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for anything that I might of said or done that may have offended you."  
  
She noted he was being unusually formal, maybe he knew something that she didn't.  
  
"Commander," she said equally formal but sitting up slowly and smiling at him, "if you did I can't remember. You're a bad influence."  
  
"Me," he said smiling back at her and relaxing, "it wasn't my idea to open the second bottle."  
  
He was right, she had wanted to forget about kissing him, so she wouldn't feel like doing it again, and she hadn't chosen the most sensible way to do that. She just wanted her life to be normal for once; she was tired of exploring, of fighting, of always having to be there when people needed her. Of being lonely, she admitted it to herself then, but she couldn't admit it to anyone else.  
  
"Are you coming to dinner tonight?" She enquired.  
  
"What?" He sounded shocked for a moment. She stood up.  
  
"It's Wednesday," she replied simply.  
  
"O.k.," he said, she was heading towards him.  
  
"I think I'm going to visit sickbay," she said stopping in front of him.  
  
"Just make sure you get the painkiller before the sermon," he joked and they both laughed, settling into their old rhythm again.  
  
The ship jerked, sending the Captain hurtling towards the floor where she would have landed painfully if it wasn't for Chakotay who caught her as she fell, somehow managing to keep himself stable. He had strong arms, her saviour as always, she stopped herself from thinking it. Straightening herself up she charged purposefully onto her bridge.  
  
"Report," she yelled, forgetting her hangover. Chakotay was sitting down.  
  
"We are under attack from an unknown vessel," Tuvok informed her, his voice calm as usual, "our weapons and shields are superior to theirs however; they may have more ships in the area."  
  
The captain nodded at him thinking over his concise review of the situation and turned to face the view screen. The ship was large, almost twice the size of Voyager, but it looked old, the ship fired again.  
  
"Hail them," she commanded.  
  
"They're not responding Captain," Harry Kim replied.  
  
"Then we'll make them," the Captain said, "fire phaser's at their weapons array, disable it." She sat down on her chair, the big chair, that's what the crew called it, but it fit her perfectly.  
  
"Their weapons systems have been disabled Captain and they are hailing us," Tuvok told her.  
  
"On screen," she said knowing that this was going to be another delta day.  
  
"I am Yertj'k Hrut, captain of the Jixel vessel Opine, please withdraw from this sector immediately, you are trespassing in Jixil territory." The Captain of the alien Vessel finished.  
  
  
  
Oh great the Captain said unpronounceable's, that is what they had called species with difficult names in the academy. Their species looked almost human which they had found to be quite rare in the delta quadrant.  
  
"We apologise for trespassing Captain Hrut," she responded, hoping she had pronounced his name correctly, "we were unaware that this area of space belonged to somebody."  
  
"Now you are aware and you can leave," the alien Captain notified her. " My name is Captain Janeway, my crew and I are just trying to get home," she said as reasonably as she could.  
  
"That is not my problem Captain Janeway," the alien Captain was being uncooperative, "now leave our space immediately."  
  
"If we have to travel around your area of space it will add months to our journey, if you allowed us passage we would be gone in just over a week," she explained.  
  
"That is not my problem, now withdraw immediately before I am forced to remove you," he said becoming even more annoyed.  
  
"We would be willing to trade technology for passage through your space," she said, Chakotay's head shot around as did a lot of the crew on the bridge.  
  
"I'm sorry Captain, that won't be possible," the alien seemed to be losing the little patience he had, "there are no exceptions to that law, now turn your ship around and leave immediately."  
  
The alien disappeared from the view screen and was replaced by the image of his ship, the Captain sat back down, exasperated.  
  
"Tom, set a course around Jixel space," her voice was flat as she gave the order, "Commander you have the bridge."  
  
She disappeared once more into her ready room, not noticing that everyone on the bridge was staring at her. She hoped that Chakotay would know her well enough not to follow, he did.  
  
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I put two sections together here because one was really, really short.  
  
Tell me what you think.  
  
I love feedback. 


	7. Chapter 7

It's been a couple of days because I was at a party (I do have a live outside of sci-fi). This is another short one but like I said I had to write them that way. I don't really like this chapter but it's necessary for the story to progress. Please give me your opinion.  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager and it's characters are not mine.  
  
Spoilers: None.  
  
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They sat in silence eating their dinner, usually they talked about the past week, what was happening on the ship, but Chakotay was just glad she hadn't cancelled after what had happened that day.  
  
She wasn't really eating, just pushing her food around her plate with her fork; he put his own fork down and looked straight at her.  
  
"Kathryn," he said and paused, choosing his next words carefully, he decided on the direct approach, maybe not his best idea but it was an idea, "Why did you offer our technology to an obviously less developed species?"  
  
She looked him straight in the eyes and he felt his will weaken, but he wasn't going to give up.  
  
"How do you know they were less advanced, their," she started, he wouldn't let her finish.  
  
"How do you know that they weren't, we've never met them before," he interrupted.  
  
"They were warp capable," she said.  
  
"So are the Kazon," he countered.  
  
She looked down and he knew he'd won, she was going to explain.  
  
"I'm tired Chakotay," she said.  
  
He didn't understand, she hadn't said it like a request for him to leave, he didn't think she meant tired in that way, so he waited for her to expand on the simple statement. When she glanced up again her eyes were sad.  
  
"I'm tired of my life, all I do is fight, life shouldn't be a constant struggle."  
  
He stood up when she'd finished talking and walked over to her, his Captain, his friend, he put a hand gently on her shoulder.  
  
"I understand, it's different for you, you're the captain, the rest of the crew they get time off," he said sympathetically, he did understand to some extent, he'd bee a Captain once.  
  
Then she did something surprised him, and very little still surprised him. She started to cry. He knelt beside her on the floor. In the last couple of days he'd seen a new side of her, she was a fighter, he'd never known her to give up before. He ran the back of his fingers down the side of her cheek and wiped away a tear with his thumb. He hugged her just like he had so many times on new earth, and she sobbed into his shoulder. ************************************************************************  
  
Read and review.  
  
Next chapter coming soon. 


	8. Chapter 8

Words in Italics mean the character is thinking. This is the last chapter in this section of the story, tell me what you think.  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager is not mine neither are its characters or technology.  
  
Spoilers: None.  
  
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She woke up and opened her eyes. This was the second time she'd awoken unsure of her location in so many mornings.  
  
It's starting to become a habit.  
  
She noticed there was an arm resting around her waist, Chakotay's arm. She was lying behind her with one arm under his head and the other arm around her. Kathryn glanced at him; he looked peaceful as he always did. She lifted up her right arm and ran her fingers along his hand, resting her fingers between his own and closing her eyes again. She felt a lot better. After crying most of the night she fallen asleep, exhausted.  
  
Maybe that's what I needed all this time, to let myself relax and cry.  
  
He'd comforted her, until then, telling her to stop apologising to him as she had several times. It was so unlike her to break down like that, especially in front of somebody.  
  
She felt him wake up and realise where her hand was resting, so she stroked it gently with her index finger. She felt his body shift beside her, she was making him uncomfortable. That made a change; it was usually the other way around. Maybe he didn't want there to be any possibility he was taking advantage of her. That would be just like Chakotay, always honourable.  
  
She felt different, lighter, like she was free, even though she knew it wasn't true. She'd have to go back to being The Captain soon.  
  
She turned over to face him, he wasn't smiling, his eyes appeared concerned but his arm remained around her waist. She'd always known that if anything was going to happen between them she'd have to start it. He'd made his feelings clear on numerous occasions; he was waiting for her to be ready. She was ready, but now he looked uncertain.  
  
She lifted the hand that had been resting on his and placed it on the side of his face. He didn't move.  
  
Is he still waiting or has he changed his mind.  
  
His arm tightened around her waist as if he could sense her silent fears. Her head moved closer to his and after a moments hesitation she kissed him. This was the third time she'd kissed him; she had a vague memory of kissing him when she was drunk. This was different, she was finally sure.  
  
When they separated she smiled at him but he still looked unsure, she wasn't going to mess him about anymore.  
  
"I'm ready," she told him and he finally smiled back at her.  
  
Kathryn hugged him, burying her face in his chest, she felt him kiss the top of her head lightly.  
  
"Perhaps you should take the day off," he said. Her mood changed, she didn't like people telling her what to do. He must have sensed the change in her.  
  
"It's just a suggestion," he added, "I am your first officer after all, I'm concerned for you. It's not like we can drop you off at Risa for a holiday."  
  
She laughed and relaxed again.  
  
Maybe I do need a break.  
  
There was a lot of stress involved in being The Captain, especially so far away from home.  
  
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Review, review review, review.  
  
Thank you. 


	9. Chapter 9

I know it's been a while since I posted the last chapter but I've been too busy to type this up.  
  
This is the second part of the story, and I have it all worked out in my head, but it takes time to type out.  
  
Disclaimer: The Voyager characters do not belong to me, I'm not that lucky.  
  
There are no spoilers in this as far as I know, if I'm wrong tell me.  
  
Please remember to review.  
  
A year. She thought. It's been a year since I gave into him, into my own feelings. And the time has flown over.  
  
She felt wonderful. Happy. And this was going to be a special anniversary. He was making dinner on the holodeck, but that's wasn't it. She was going to tell him something, something that would change their lives. So far they had managed to keep their relationship a secret from the crew, nobody even suspected anything other than close friendship between them. That was about to change. She wasn't sure how it had happened. She had always been in control of her life.  
  
She stopped outside the holodeck doors and hit her com. Badge.  
  
"Janeway to Chakotay."  
  
"Yes Captain," he said, professionally.  
  
"I'm waiting," she said in a mock impatient tone.  
  
"Sorry," he replied.  
  
The doors in front of her opened and she gasped when she saw the room. It had been transformed into their clearing on New Earth. Every tree, every rock, it was virtually identical. The only difference being that now, outside the home they had shared for that short period of time, there was a beautifully decorated table. The clearing was quite dark, the only light coming from a few candles on the table and scattered randomly around the clearing itself.  
  
"Are you going to come in?" Chakotay asked, he was standing beside the table.  
  
She stepped tentatively into the bewitching room. The long black dress she was wearing started to move in the simulated breeze. Chakotay pulled out a chair for her to sit in. The doors closed behind her and she looked back briefly.  
  
This is it, there's no going back.  
  
She sat had sat down and was beginning to feel nervous. Chakotay sat opposite her.  
  
"Computer, activate privacy locks, authorization, Janeway-alpha-three-two- nine," she said and took a deep breath. "Chakotay."  
  
"Kathryn," he said, "I love you."  
  
She smiled at him before taking another deep breath and continuing. She had no idea how he was going to take her news, but she hoped he'd be as happy as she was.  
  
"Kathryn?" Chakotay said again, interrupting her thoughts. He sounded concerned.  
  
She grinned.  
  
"I've got something to tell you."  
  
"What?" He asked curiously.  
  
Just tell him.  
  
"I'm pregnant," she said bluntly.  
  
She lost her smile.  
  
His mouth hung open.  
  
He stared at her, shocked and not responding to her statement for some time.  
  
"H-how?" He spluttered.  
  
Kathryn raised her eyebrows.  
  
"That's wonderful," he grinned.  
  
"I'm glad you're happy about it," she said.  
  
"Of course I am," he said, "have you been to see the doctor yet?"  
  
"No, I only realised a few days ago, I wanted to tell you first."  
  
He pulled her up by the hands and into a hug.  
  
"Can we keep it to ourselves for a little while please?" She asked hime.  
  
"Of course Katie."  
  
She laughed.  
  
"Katie," she repeated, "it's been a long time since anybody called me that." Another deep breath, "Chakotay, when the crew find out, everything's going to change."  
  
"I know," he agreed, "It'll be okay though, we're going to have a baby, a son."  
  
"You sound certain," she looked up, "we might be having a girl."  
  
"Do you want to ask the doctor what it is?"  
  
"No, do you?"  
  
"It would spoil the surprise," he answered. "So, what about Benjamin."  
  
"Names already, that's probably bad luck," she said, "and it's a boys name. How about Taya?"  
  
"Or Katie."  
  
She laughed again.  
  
"Why don't we have dinner now." She suggested.  
  
"I've got a better idea," he said, kissing her.  
  
What did you think? Please tell me.  
  
The next chapter should be up soon but I have a lot of work to do. 


	10. Chapter 10

This story is turning into a monster; it wasn't supposed to be this long. Anyway, please read and review.  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager is not mine.  
  
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"Captain, it's an M class planet. There's plenty of vegetation and even some dilithium." Harry Kim informed her when she called for a report as she stepped onto the bridge.  
  
She was wearing a long black dress and looked slightly flushed, so did the Commander.  
  
They must have been in a hurry to get here after my communication.  
  
They were both smiling.  
  
It makes a nice change to see the Captain smiling, she's usually worrying about something.  
  
"Ensign Kim," the Captains voice was disturbing his thoughts.  
  
"Yes Captain."  
  
I hope she hasn't already asked me a question.  
  
"Is the planet inhabited?" She asked cheerfully.  
  
"No," he answered simply.  
  
"Commander, assemble an away team to take to the surface. See if Neelix is out of sickbay yet, he could be useful." The Captain told him.  
  
"Harry, you're with me," Chakotay informed him, as usual things were moving quickly. "Chakotay to Davis, meet me in transporter room one."  
  
"Captain," Harry said.  
  
What's wrong with me today?  
  
"Yes Harry," she responded, the bridge was silent. Everybody had stopped moving.  
  
"Um, we can't transport to the surface, there's some disturbance in the outer atmosphere that would interfere with the transporters."  
  
"And you didn't think this was important enough to mention before?" The captain said but he knew she wasn't angry. Still, she had an amazing ability to make him feel small.  
  
"Sorry Captain," he said, making no excuses.  
  
"Commander, take a shuttle," she corrected.  
  
"Chakotay to Davis," he seemed slightly impatient now, "meet me in shuttle bay one instead. Chakotay to sickbay how's Neelix?"  
  
They were on the move again, on the way to the shuttle bay.  
  
"His condition remains the same, as does his complaining. The rash should clear up in couple of days," he said getting back to the point.  
  
"Thank you doctor, Chakotay out," he finished and turned to Harry, "looks like it's just going to be the three of us."  
  
"Yes Sir," Harry replied, still a little embarrassed about his earlier over sight.  
  
*********************************  
  
"The shuttle is entering the upper atmosphere," Tuvok said in his emotionless voice.  
  
"Keep me informed on their progress," she said, relaxing into her chair.  
  
"Captain, a vessel is decloaking, it's less than 10 km from our hull." Tuvok told her.  
  
"Cloaking technology in the Delta quadrant!" She exclaimed sitting up straight.  
  
"They're hailing us, audio only," Tuvok's voice remained coll.  
  
Captain Janeway nodded at him and a menacing voice sounded through the room.  
  
"Welcome to Tol Norath."  
  
"Was that it?" She asked Tuvok, "well, it didn't sound very welcoming. Shields up, red alert."  
  
The bridge was bathed in red light.  
  
"They're locking a tractor beam on the shuttle, its being pulled out of the planets atmosphere," shouted an Ensign who was standing at Harry's post.  
  
The Captain was thinking fast, the ship could just be protecting the planet. If she fired first then it could escalate the situation, but she couldn't just sit there. They could be hostile.  
  
"Tuvok, hail the alien vessel," she said. Tuvok complied.  
  
"No response."  
  
"They're powering weapons and firing," the Ensign yelled again.  
  
Voyager shook with the impact.  
  
"Shields are holding for now," Tuvok said calmly.  
  
"Return fire, aim for their weapons array," Captain Janeway commanded.  
  
"We can't penetrate their shields," the Ensign told her.  
  
"Keep firing," she insisted.  
  
"The alien vessel is firing on the shuttle as well Captain."  
  
The shuttle was much worse off than Voyager, they had minimum shields and weapons, but the ship was firing on Voyager at the same time. And doing damage.  
  
"Janeway to Torres," she yelled, after hitting her com. Badge, "get them out of that shuttle."  
  
"I can't Captain," B'elanna shouted frantically, "transporters are down, along with replicators and the holo-emmiters. Even the doctors off line."  
  
"Keep trying," she said, fear was building up inside her, "Janeway out."  
  
"Captain," Tuvok's calm voice contrasted with the fear and tension on the rest of the bridge, "the shuttle is hailing us."  
  
"On screen," she ordered.  
  
Maybe they have an idea.  
  
Voyager was still firing on the ship but barely making a dint in their shields.  
  
"Captain, can you transport us off the shuttle?" Chakotay asked.  
  
"No, I'm afraid not," she answered desperately trying to keep her voice level, "The transporters are down. B'elanna's working on it, just hang on."  
  
"Most of our systems are down, the warp core is going to overload in," he looked down at the panel in front of him, "49 seconds."  
  
Kathryn's heart sank, and she felt her panic intensify.  
  
"Kathryn, he said, she looked into his eyes. The bridge was silent, even in the midst of the chaos, "Kinich Adau," he smiled at her.  
  
"I'll add it to the list," she said sadly.  
  
She didn't notice the crews visible confusion to their last exchange, or even their obvious sadness as each of them realised what was happening. How the routine mission had gone fatally wrong.  
  
"Chakotay out."  
  
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What did you think?  
  
I don't mind one word answers if that's all you can be bothered to write but please review. So, good, bad, ok, terrible, whatever I don't mind. 


	11. Chapter 11

New chapter, I'm posting two together again because on their own they are far too short any way, please read and review.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Voyager or any of the characters.  
  
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Chakotay turned away form the screen aware that he had very little time to carry out his plan. He'd wanted to spend the last moments of his life speaking to Kathryn, but he couldn't. So he'd just said a brief goodbye and suggested a name for they're child, a child that would grow up without father.  
  
"Harry," he said quickly, "let's see if we can give Voyager a hand."  
  
Ensign Davis was lying unconscious and forgotten on the floor of the shuttle. Her panel had exploded soon after the attack had began, sending her back against the wall in a wall of flame and thunder.  
  
"What do you think?" Harry asked, trying to keep his voice level, like that of his commanding officer.  
  
"Locate their weapons array," Chakotay said.  
  
"But we don't have weapons and even if we did we couldn't penetrate their shields," Harry argued.  
  
"No," Chakotay agreed, "but, in." He checked the panel in front of him, "17 seconds this shuttle is going to explode. And I'm sure that will do some damage to their shields."  
  
"Yes sir," Harry said, understanding Chakotay's plan, "I've located their main weapons array."  
  
"Setting a course," Chakotay said, pressing the buttons.  
  
****************************  
  
The explosion sent shock waves through space, and blew a hole right through the alien vessels shields. Tuvok didn't even ask, he fired through the gap and hit the weapons array directly, disabling it immediately.  
  
"The alien vessel is leaving," Tuvok informed her.  
  
"Collect the debris," Kathryn said her voice cold and flat, "Tuvok, you have the bridge."  
  
She walked away, leaving the crew on the bridge in shock.  
  
Kathryn sat behind her desk feeling numb. Her hand shook as she reached out and touched a button on the control panel.  
  
"Captains log."  
  
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The senior staff were assembled in the briefing room (?), 3 hours after the attack. Kathryn Janeway sat at the head of the table, still reeling from the shock. The room was silent; they sat like that for what seemed like an eternity, B'Elanna, Tom, Seven, and her. B'Elanna looked like she was on the brink of tears, Tom had a comforting hand on her arm.  
  
Good luck, you're going to need it.  
  
Neelix entered the room, looking cheerless.  
  
His rash is clearing up quite well, that's a shame. Well he deserved it, and at least he knows not to eat oranges again.  
  
"Neelix, I'm very glad you could join us," Kathryn said, she didn't sound glad, she sounded bitter.  
  
The whole room was staring at her, all a little surprised at her harsh tone.  
  
"Tol-Norath," the Captain said simply.  
  
Neelix hung his head, focusing his gaze on the floor.  
  
"Captain, I.," he started, "I've heard of the Tol-Norath, it's an area of space occupied by pirates."  
  
"Yes, well, it seems that we've stumbled into that area of space,"  
  
"The pirates loot passing ships," he finished quietly, not meeting the Captains eyes.  
  
"And you didn't think that this was important enough to mention before now," Kathryn said in the same bitter manner.  
  
"I, I, I," Neelix stuttered, "I didn't know that we were here, I mean there, in the Tol-Norath."  
  
"It seems," the Captain said angrily, standing up, "that you don't know much about anything. You're not much of a cook or a guide and you don't appear to have any other use."  
  
She walked out of the room and headed for her quarters.  
  
Maybe I was a little hard on him, it's not his fault.  
  
It doesn't matter, Chakotay's gone.  
  
You shouldn't blame other people, it's your fault.  
  
Just get through the memorial service and everything will be fine.  
  
You can apologise to Neelix there.  
  
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Review me, I need something to keep me going while I type the rest up. 


	12. Chapter 12

Very short chapter before the start of phase three which is all written ou, I just need to find the time to type it up.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own 'em. Please don't sue me.  
  
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A large portion of the crew were crammed into the mess hall and those that could not be present were listening to the service on the com. channel.  
  
Kathryn Janeway stood in full dress uniform.  
  
I feel like I should be wearing black like a grieving widow.  
  
It was two days after the attack but it felt like forever. She felt lost and was running completely on autopilot, barely eating or sleeping and desperately trying to avoid thinking about the month old foetus growing inside her. But her hand still drifted absently to her abdomen.  
  
"Ensign Harry Kim," she began, her voice flat and emotionless, "he came to us fresh out of the academy. He proved his worth on many occasions and he became a friend."  
  
She was trying to keep her speech as brief as possible so she could make it through without breaking down.  
  
"Ensign Cassandra Davis was a brilliant young engineer, I didn't know her as well as I should have but her work showed she was determined and talented."  
  
Kathryn took a deep breath before starting the hardest part.  
  
"Commander Chakotay," she paused, her voice dropping to just above a whisper, "Chakotay was a fine first officer, he knew when to stand down, when to hold his ground and when to keep fighting even in the face of death."  
  
That was all she could manage, a tear ran down her cheek as she tried desperately to control her emotions. She felt a hand on her shoulder.  
  
Chakotay?  
  
It was Tuvok. He understood a lot about emotions, for a Vulcan.  
  
"They were fine officers, a great loss... to us all," she finished.  
  
I need to get out.  
  
She felt suddenly sick and couldn't stay there. Quickly she turned on her heel and walked out of the mess hall, managing to reach the deserted corridors before she broke down in tears.  
  
I don't know why I'm hiding this from them; they're going to find out.  
  
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Review it.  
  
Please.  
  
Please.  
  
Please.  
  
Any review is a good review. 


	13. Chapter 13

Really short chapter but I'm hoping to post two today. For some reason my fingers don't really want to type though for some reason.  
  
Thanks for all the reviews, feel free to keep writing them. (hint, hint).  
  
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"Personal log of Captain Kathryn Janeway," her voice was level as she spoke to the empty room.  
  
"It's been over a month since we lost the shuttle. since I lost Chakotay. I haven't been to see the doctor yet. I can't. The moment he finds out something will change."  
  
She shifted position in her seat.  
  
"I haven't been much of a Captain lately and, I've been thinking. Maybe it would be better for everyone if Tuvok was Captain and I retired."  
  
"B'lanna found a way to penetrate the shields of the pirate's vessels. I can't remember how she said it worked but it works. Still every time I see one of their ships I am reminded of Chakotay, even firing on them has lost its appeal."  
  
"Its 0400 hours but I can't sleep and every time I try to I see his face. When I eat I feel sick. When I move I feel exhausted and dizzy. Every waking moment is agony, grief tormenting me and clouding very decision I make. But when I do manage to sleep my dreams are haunted by that explosion, rocking the ship and ruining her life."  
  
She walked across the room. "Damn," she muttered, hitting the replicator.  
  
"I've got no replicator rations left, I'm going to have to go to the mess hall for more coffee. It's a place I've desperately avoided, too many people. Concerned eyes. Its early, it should be empty."  
  
She looked briefly at her reflection in the view port and sighed. Her hair had grown and was hanging limply over her shoulders, grey and white strands weaving their way through her other colour. There were bags under her eyes and her skin was a pale grey. Running a hand through her hair she turned away from the view port, picked up her Starfleet jacket and headed out the door towards the turbo lift.  
  
The floor seemed to move below her as she stepped in, black spots danced in front of her eye. Clutching the wall for support she felt dark clouds overcome her and her legs gave way. Lying unconscious, sprawled across the floor of the turbo lift Kathryn didn't notice the doors close.  
  
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I told you it was short, please review.  
  
Thank you. 


	14. Chapter 14

Next chapter up, nearly done, the end is in sight. It was supposed to be up yesterday but my fingers (or brain) forgot how to type.  
  
Remember to review please.  
  
Disclaimer: It's not mine as I explained in the other chapters, it belongs to Paramount or something.  
  
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"Mr Paris," the doctor addressed him, "I expect you to keep this information to yourself."  
  
"Of course," Tom agreed, "I still can't believe that the Captain is pregnant."  
  
"Yes, well," the doctor said, "it's none of your business."  
  
"This explains a lot though," Tom was following the doctor around.  
  
"It does?" The doctor seemed impatient.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You think that because the Captain is pregnant it explains her behaviour lately," the doctor suggested.  
  
"Its obvious who the father was," Tom continued, his voice becoming less enthusiastic, "there was only one member of the crew who."  
  
"Mr Paris," the croaky voice came from behind him, he jumped. "I don't appreciate people gossiping about me. I would prefer it if you kept this news to yourself and stopped speculating."  
  
"Yes Captain," Tom said, looking at the floor then walking away.  
  
It's obvious who the father is. There was only one person on the ship that she would have had a relationship with. It had to be Chakotay. No wonders she's been acting so strangely. I've lost a best friend but she's lost a lover, the father of her child. If it had been B'lanna.  
  
"Captain to the bridge," the call came as Kathryn was getting off the biobed, and she realised she wasn't wearing her Com. Badge.  
  
Ignoring the dizziness and nausea that almost overwhelmed her she headed out of sick bay.  
  
"Captain, Captain," she heard the doctor call after her, non doubt to tell her she wasn't well enough to leave. The sound faded behind the closing doors of sickbay.  
  
  
  
She walked along the corridors of her ship at a high speed the crew hadn't seen her use in weeks, although the purpose of her stride was mainly to try and avoid the doctor the sudden discovery of her secret made the need to prove herself resurface.  
  
"Report," she gathered all her strength to yell it at the bridge crew but it still came out a little quiet.  
  
"A ship has de-cloaked and is hailing us," Tuvok stated clearly, he had not missed the Captains odd behaviour and was unsure as to how she would react to the hail.  
  
"Open fire," she barked, collapsing wearily into her seat.  
  
"Captain, they are making no attempts to attack," Tuvok thought this should change her mind, she was not acting logically.  
  
Kathryn thought for a moment, glancing at the empty seat behind her, the strain of yet another decision showing on her face.  
  
"On screen," she said gravel, frowning at the view screen.  
  
So that's what they look like, the aliens that have ruined my life.  
  
They weren't that different from humans. They were bald and their skin had a bluish tint but apart from that they looked very similar to humans.  
  
"Captain Janeway?" The alien asked.  
  
"Yes," she replied sternly.  
  
"I've been looking for you," he said.  
  
"Really, why?" She asked in an uninterested tone. She was gripping the sides of her chair to physically stop herself standing up and giving the order to fire. She could taste the hatred she felt for the alien she hadn't even seen before.  
  
"We are." the alien began.  
  
"I know who you are," Janeway interrupted harshly, unable to keep the pain from her voice.  
  
"No Captain you don't," the alien countered, "the area of space known as the Tol Norath was once part of our empire. We are the Lateck. The name Tol Norath means sudden hell, it was given to the region when it was overtaken by pirates and renegades from our society and many others."  
  
"I'm not interested in your species history," Janeway barked with unusual impatience.  
  
"You are now leaving the Tol Norath," the alien announced proudly, a smile spread across his face.  
  
"Thank you that was very informative," the Captain said briskly.  
  
The crew members present on the bridge didn't seem too concerned with their Captains attitude towards the alien.  
  
"Captain we have a gift for you, something that was taken from you," the aliens smile widened even further.  
  
"Keep it," the Captain said and was just about to shut off the channel when the alien spoke again.  
  
"I think you'll want this back." He beckoned over an alien woman and muttered something to her. The woman left hastily. "One moment Captain, I'm afraid when you have a ship this small it can get very crowded and unfortunately the bridge isn't big enough."  
  
A moment later the female returned and with her. Kathryn's eyes widened as the walked in front of the view screen. Harry Kim, Ensign Davis and .  
  
Where is he?  
  
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I'm nasty, I know. Is he there or not?  
  
Tell me what you think. Review.  
  
I'm not above begging so please, please please tell me what you think. (I would have written more pleases but it was making me dizzy.) 


	15. Chapter 15

I know I haven't updated this for a while but I've been busy with collage work. I should actually be doing some now but I can't be bothered.  
  
I know this chapter is short but it was going to be even shorter and I am posting another one today.  
  
Disclaimer: The stories mine. Voyager and its characters aren't. Don't sue.  
  
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She saw him, standing on the alien vessel. Smiling at her with the most emotion she had ever seen visible on his face. Joy, relief, love.  
  
"We rescued them from slavery on a mining colony," the alien captain was explaining. Kathryn wasn't listening. She couldn't focus on his words. The dizziness was back and she was fighting the grey haze. It was trying to make her faint again.  
  
No not now. She silently screamed at herself.  
  
Her hand went to her forehead, desperately trying to steady herself in the sudden turmoil.  
  
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She looks beautiful. Beautiful, but ill.  
  
Chakotay watched her from his place on the bridge of the alien ship. Her hair was long and loose, tatty and unbrushed. Her skin was grey and pale. Her eyes which had at first seemed dead now swam with emotion, with love. Despite her frail underweight body and tiered features, Chakotay still thought she was beautiful.  
  
He'd forgotten how wonderful it was to look into her face, her deep blue eyes. Watching her on the screen of the Lateck vessel he saw a thousand emotions flicker across her face. He'd missed her so much, thinking he would never see her again had caused him to sink into depression.  
  
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Tell me what you think. 


	16. Chapter 16

Next chapter, it's a bit longer than the last one but not much. Somehow they look longer on paper. The end is defiantly in sight. There is one more short chapter that I have to post and then it's done. Review.  
  
Disclaimer: Voyager is not mine.  
  
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2 weeks previously.  
  
Chakotay sat in the dark cold, damp cave he had been assigned to along with Harry and Cassie. They'd bee in the mines for two weeks but it seemed like an eternity to Chakotay. Their captors, the pirates of the Tol Norath had taken them to the mining planet as slaves after transporting them from the shuttle, mere moments before it was destroyed. Right now Chakotay felt he would rather be dead then without Kathryn.  
  
"Chakotay," Harry's voice sounded form beside him, Chakotay looked up at the Ensign. They'd had their uniforms taken from them when they arrived, now they were wearing plain brown tops and trousers. Harry's skin and clothes were coated with weeks of dirt and sweat; he had stopped working for just a moment to speak with Chakotay.  
  
"You have to work," Harry told him, "we need to play along until we can find a way out."  
  
"And then what?" Chakotay asked, "Voyager is gone, they think we're dead."  
  
"You will be dead if they catch you slacking off," Harry said, Cassie had moved to stand the other side of him, showing her agreement with Harry.  
  
"I can only hope," Chakotay said, hating the self pity in his words and the fact that he was showing them so much emotion, in his voice, his face and his posture, but he couldn't help it. The pain was too much for him to bear, he couldn't take it anymore.  
  
"We've got to come up with a way to get out of here," Harry said, signalling for Cassie to sit down as he did.  
  
"We're never going to leave," Chakotay said, staring straight ahead at the solid rock wall in front of him.  
  
Around them the other slaves were moving away. Talk of escape could result I death, even if it was just talk. That's what they had been told when they arrived.  
  
Maybe it's worth a try then.  
  
"Stop feeling sorry for yourself Chakotay," Cassie snapped, "it's not like you."  
  
"Self pity is all I have left now. I've lost my lover, my child, my life. It's perfectly normal for me to feel sorry for myself, maybe you should try it." Chakotay said in a flat voice.  
  
"Chakotay, I think you're delirious or something," Harry suggested, "here." He held out a container of water.  
  
"I'm fine," Chakotay hit the water away.  
  
"Chakotay you don't have a child." Cassie explained softly.  
  
"She's pregnant," Chakotay smiled and laughed bitterly.  
  
"Who?" Cassie asked, her brow creased in confusion.  
  
"Oh god," Harry said, Chakotay looked up at him, noticing the realization on his face, "Captain Janeway."  
  
That was it, the secret was out. Chakotay turned his attention back to the wall, not even acknowledging Harry's discovery.  
  
"Tom always said there was something between you two," Harry said, looking shocked, "I just thought he was being Tom."  
  
"Well it doesn't matter now," Chakotay said.  
  
Cassie looked stunned, and started to stutter something.  
  
"W, w, were you ,um, seeing her when we went out?" She asked. "Was that why you?"  
  
"No," Chakotay answered, it was only half a lie. She was being very selfish.  
  
Good for her, maybe she's starting to understand the self pity thing.  
  
"You have to try and get out of here," she said sensibly, recovering form her shock, "for them."  
  
"They're gone," Chakotay said bluntly, standing up and walking away from the two crew members.  
  
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I know this is a little out of character but most of the story is. Sorry. Tell me what you think. 


	17. Chapter 17

Very, very short final chapter. I'm sorry it's taken so long to update but I've been busy doing coursework and things.  
  
I'm sure it was obvious all along that I wouldn't let Chakotay die.  
  
Thank you to everyone who reviewed this, I'm very grateful to all of you.  
  
Present time  
  
Chakotay as ashamed at his behaviour when he'd thought he'd lost her forever. He'd rather have died than lived without her. She was there in front of him now and he felt like crying with joy. He wanted to hold her, to feel her against him, against his skin.  
  
"Beam them directly to the bridge," Kathryn was saying in a hoarse whisper.  
  
She looked and sounded as if she was seeing a ghost, which, he thought, must be true, at least in her mind.  
  
********  
  
"Beam them directly to the bridge," she heard herself say in an uncertain voice, unshed tears in her eyes.  
  
It seemed so unreal, she needed to see him in the flesh, to touch him, to kiss him.  
  
A few seconds later the three of them appeared in front of her ready room doors, Cassandra Davis, Harry Kim and, standing slightly ahead of them, a very tense looking Chakotay.  
  
Kathryn stood up from her seat shakily, Chakotay took a few tentative steps towards her. Reaching out an unsteady hand she touched his face. She was unaware that all eyes on the bridge were on them. She fell into his arms, crying, finally letting Kathryn, and not Captain Janeway. come first. He kissed the top of her head, also unaware that they were surrounded by the crew until a few moments later.  
  
"Our secrets out Kathryn," he whispered to her.  
  
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And they lived happily ever after  
  
THE END. 


	18. Epilogue

Some people didn't like the way this story ended in the last chapter and I didn't like it much myself. So, when I got my new laptop and was rearranging my files I decided to write an epilogue. I have also decided to write a sequel but there is more about that at the end.  
  
This is a bit longer than the other chapters so bare with it.  
  
Disclaimer: Unfortunately Voyager and everything associated with the star trek universe do not belong to me.  
  
Epilogue  
  
"You look awful," he commented lightly when she pulled back from the hug.  
  
"Thanks," she laughed, "you don't look too hot yourself."  
  
He stepped back, smiling.  
  
"I'm gone for a month and the whole place goes down the drain."  
  
"It's been one hell of a month," she laughed, "welcome back."  
  
"It's great to be back, Captain," Harry grinned.  
  
"You must all be wanting to get back to your quarters and your friends," Kathryn addressed them, trying to remain professional, even through the tears. "So, just as soon as you've been checked over in sickbay, you all have a week off. After that though, I want you all back and ready to work."  
  
"Aye Captain," they all replied.  
  
Kathryn turned back to the view screen and the smiling alien. The smiling alien and the dancing black dots.  
  
*Not you again*  
  
She gripped the back off the Conn. Chair to steady herself. She swayed again.  
  
"Damn," she swore quietly.  
  
"Captain?" the Ensign on conn. questioned.  
  
The world went black.  
  
The Ensign caught her clumsily as she fell.  
  
"Captain?" He asked again.  
  
"Kathryn!" Chakotay shouted, rushing to her side.  
  
The rest of the bridge crew were gathering.  
  
"Chakotay to sickbay," he said, hitting the struggling Ensigns com. Badge.  
  
"Commander?" The doctors puzzled voice responded.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You're dead."  
  
"No I'm not," Chakotay answered.  
  
"But..is there a glitch in my programme? I must call Lieutenant Tor."  
  
"Doctor," Chakotay interrupted, "the Captain's fainted.  
  
"Again!?" The doctor exclaimed.  
  
"What do you mean `again`?" Chakotay asked.  
  
"I told her not to leave sickbay," the doctor continued, "of course, nobody listens to me. I'm just a hologram. What do I know?"  
  
"Doctor!!!" Chakotay shouted, laying Kathryn on the floor.  
  
"Oh yes," the doctor said, "Lieutenant Paris was already on his way to recapture our Captain. He should be there any moment."  
  
The turbolift doors' opened and Tom stepped out, looking ready for a fight.  
  
"That was quick," Harry commented, smiling.  
  
"Harry!" Tom shouted, "Cassie!? Chakotay!?"  
  
He stood frozen, gawping at the figures on the bridge  
  
"Tom!" Chakotay shouted, checking Kathryn's pulse.  
  
The alien on the view screen looked worried.  
  
"Is your Captain ill?" He asked, "why is she unconscious?"  
  
"She's fine," Chakotay answered with less patience than he should have for the man who had saved his life, "thank you for all you have done. Can we discuss anything more later?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Thank you. End transmission," Chakotay finished and looked back to Tom, "what's wrong?"  
  
"Nothing," Tom answered, "just low blood sugar."  
  
He winked at Chakotay who just frowned.  
  
"This is more than just low blood sugar, Tom," Chakotay said.  
  
Tom lowered his voice so only Chakotay could hear.  
  
"While you were all." he hesitated, "gone, she wasn't exactly looking after herself. And for someone in her condition, well the stress hasn't helped much."  
  
He began to pick her up.  
  
"What are you doing?" Chakotay asked.  
  
"She needs to go back to sickbay," Tom explained, "the transporters were knocked out in the last raid. B'lanna hasn't finished fixing them yet."  
  
"How is B'lanna?"  
  
"Um," Tom thought of how to phrase it, "not good. She took your.deaths hard. Not as hard as the Captain but then. They both blamed themselves."  
  
"I'll take her," Chakotay told him, picking Kathryn up.  
  
*********************************************************************  
  
Kathryn opened her eyes groggily and looked up into Chakotay's worried face.  
  
"Hey," he said, "I hear you haven't been taking care of yourself properly."  
  
"Chakotay," she said, sitting up slowly, "don't lecture me; you don't know what it's been like."  
  
"I won't lecture you but I will have the doctor ban you from drinking anymore coffee."  
  
"What!" She exclaimed, suddenly wide awake.  
  
"Don't worry Commander, I already have," the doctor told her, approaching after completing Harry and Cassie's physicals.  
  
"Um.congratulations Captain," Cassie grinned.  
  
"Yeah," Harry agreed, "congratulations."  
  
She looked accusingly tat Chakotay.  
  
"I told them," he admitted sheepishly, "sorry."  
  
"We think you should make the announcement tonight," Tom joined the `private` conversation.  
  
"Tonight?" She asked.  
  
"In your absence the crew decided to throw another `welcome back from the dead` party," Chakotay explained, "we invited the Lateck crew along as well."  
  
"Really," she said in a displeased tone, "sounds fun."  
  
She slipped off the bed.  
  
"I'm afraid that you won't be going Captain," the doctor said, running a medical tricorder over her, "hmm."  
  
"Oh come on doc," Tom pleaded, "nearly the entire crew is going."  
  
"However, the Captain won't be," the doctor replied adamantly.  
  
"But this is `the` party doc," Tom argued.  
  
"Excuse me," Kathryn interrupted, "I'm right here and I think can manage one party. There's nothing wrong with me."  
  
"Excuse me, Captain, but who is the doctor here," he frowned, "you are not well."  
  
"I'm fine," she told him, "this was all just a bit of a shock."  
  
"Ok Captain, if you insist on jeopardising your own health and the health of you child for the sake of one party then I will prepare a hypospray. Wait here." He stalked away, muttering to himself.  
  
"Kathryn," Chakotay said, "you're going to have to start relaxing and eating right. And I'm serious about the coffee."  
  
"No lecture Chakotay, you promised."  
  
The doctor had returned and was pressing a hypospray into her neck.  
  
"Just a few vitamins," he said, cheerlessly and held out a PADD which she took automatically and checked, "I have prepared a diet plan for you."  
  
She frowned.  
  
"No arguments Captain, you will follow this plan to the letter. And I expect you back for a check-up tomorrow at 09:00," he continued, "you will be in bed by midnight and you will stay there until 08:00."  
  
"Ys dad," she said walking away.  
  
"Party starts at 19:00 in the mess hall," Tom shouted.  
  
"Ok Lieutenant," she smiled.  
  
"Fine, fine," the doctor sighed, "you can all go."  
  
*********************************************************************  
  
Kathryn walked into the busy mess hall, slightly late, due to the. Among the familiar cheerful faces of the voyager crew she could make out the Lateck, the aliens who had brought her crew home. Everyone was laughing and joking with their newly returned friends. They all seemed to be taking the sudden change in their stride. Their friends were dead and then they weren't, just another day in the delta quadrant.  
  
She located Chakotay who had caught her eye and was gesturing her over. She began to make her way over He was standing with Harry, Ensign Davis and the rest of the senior staff, plus a large proportion of the crew. She smiled and greeted people as they said "Captain."  
  
"Captain, you look radiant," Tom told her, charming, and sneaky, as always.  
  
"Thank you, Lieutenant," she replied politely.  
  
She was wearing the same dress that she had worn to her anniversary celebration, but somehow she didn't think he was complementing her clothes. It was more likely that he was trying to slip little pregnancy hints into the conversation.  
  
"Would you like to dance, Captain?" Tom asked.  
  
"Of course Tom," she smiled and followed him towards the make-shift dance floor. The music started and they danced.  
  
"Captain."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"You really should make the announcement tonight," he told her.  
  
"Excuse me," she said.  
  
"After all," he continued, still dancing slowly, "you are the captain. Your crew deserves to know."  
  
"That's right Lieutenant," she said, "I am the Captain. How would `you` like to be an Ensign?"  
  
"Ouch," he laughed, "but, you know I'm right. Everyone will find out anyway."  
  
"I can't just announce that I'm pregnant," she whispered.  
  
"Why not?" He asked.  
  
"Tom," she whispered, " I need to get my head around all of this before I begin making announcements. If the crew wants to gossip then let them. I want to keep it a `secret` for a while longer.  
  
"Captain, I understand what you're saying but a lot of the crew knows already, it's not much of a secret."  
  
"Please Tom."  
  
"Whatever you say," He grinned, "you are the Captain. But I will be expecting an announcement."  
  
"I seem to be taking orders from everyone to day," she laughed.  
  
He laughed with her.  
  
*********************************************************************  
  
The night continued and Kathryn managed to get away from all the noise and the aliens. She'd thanked them all a hundred times. Every member of the crew seemed to be doing the same. The alien vessel was parked in the docking bay and its entire crew was at the party. Voyagers own crew members had swapped over so everyone could attend.  
  
She slouched against a wall and closed her eyes.  
  
"I believe congratulations are in order, Captain."  
  
She opened her eyes to see Seven standing in front of her.  
  
"Sorry?" Kathryn asked.  
  
"I found you unconscious in the lift early this morning," she explained, "When I took you to the doctor I learned of your good news."  
  
"Oh, thank you Seven," Kathryn smiled wearily, "but we're keeping it quiet for the moment."  
  
"Commander Chakotay is the father?" She asked.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Congratulations," Seven repeated.  
  
They stood for a moment in silence. Kathryn sighed and leaned into the wall.  
  
"You look unwell Captain," Seven commented, "should I find the doctor?"  
  
"No, no, I'm fine," Kathryn smiled, "just a little tired."  
  
"Perhaps you should consider leaving early and getting some rest," Seven suggested.  
  
"I was thinking the same thing," Kathryn said, leaning forward conspiratorially, "just don't tell the doctor I said that."  
  
"I will not Captain," Seven smiled, "his ego is large enough already."  
  
Kathryn laughed.  
  
"Have you seen Commander Chakotay around here?"  
  
"I believe he has excused himself already," Seven answered.  
  
"Ok," Kathryn said, standing up straight, "goodnight Seven."  
  
"Goodnight Captain."  
  
She walked towards the exit, smiling and saying her goodnights. The doors slid open and her smile widened at the sight of Chakotay waiting patiently in the corridor.  
  
"Finally," he smiled, "I've been waiting for twenty minutes."  
  
She laughed.  
  
"You could have asked me to leave," she suggested.  
  
"I thought this might be more subtle."  
  
"Maybe too subtle," she commented.  
  
She slipped her arm through his and they started to walk.  
  
"It's been a strange day," Kathryn reasoned.  
  
"It's amazing how quickly everything seems to get back to normal," Chakotay agreed.  
  
"That's what I was thinking."  
  
"I guess it's a good thing that they seem to be taking it all in their stride," Chakotay smiled, "what time is it?"  
  
"What?" She asked confused by the sudden topic change, "23:49. Why?"  
  
"Well," he grinned, his arm slipping around her waist. He leaned into her, "the doctor did say you had to be in bed by midnight."  
  
"Oh yeah," she remembered, stopping.  
  
He pulled her closer.  
  
"I like your dress."  
  
"I missed you," she confessed, "I'm so glad you're back."  
  
"I missed you too."  
  
He leaned forwards, brushing his lips against hers.  
  
"23:51," she said against his lips.  
  
He grinned and picked her up. She didn't try to stop him. What was the harm anyway? The halls were empty.  
  
*********************************************************************  
  
What do you think? Is it better than the last ending? Be kind and review.  
  
I'm writing a sequel to this at the moment as well but I need your help.  
  
Should the baby be a girl or a boy?  
  
How old should the child be? Newborn or a little older, perhaps a toddler?  
  
Ok, thank you for reading remember to review.  
  
REVIEW. REVIEW. REVIEW. 


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